Oxymoron

I found this book, “The Humor of Christ,” at the Thrift Store recently. I did NOT create it in Photoshop or Quark or anything like that. As I’ve stated elsewhere, I’m not that good at image manipulation. It’s a real book:

humor_of_christ_front_sm.jpghumor_of_christ_back_sm1.jpg

Here an excerpt:

CHRIST: Knock, knock…
BELIEVER: Who’s there?
CHRIST: God, Almighty…
BELIEVER: God Almighty who…?
CHRIST: Ohhhh! You just took the Lord’s name in vain, breaking the third commandment. Sorry, you’re going to hell.

~~~~~

STRANGER: That’s a nice looking boutonniere (a flower or small bouquet worn, usually by a man, in the buttonhole of a lapel).
JESUS: Why, thank you, my child. Care to smell it?
STRANGER: I’d love to. [sniff] HEY! Something squirted from the flower into my eye. Ow! It stings! What the…? It’s wine! Why would wine squirt out of a flower? Ow!
JESUS: Strange…I coulda swore I filled the thing with water.

~~~

JESUS (pointing at LEPER’s chest): You have some spaghetti sauce on your robe.
LEPER (looking down): Spaghetti sauce? Where?
JESUS (tweaking LEPER’s nose): Doink!
LEPER: Oh, man, I can’t believe I fell for that one. Hey…my nose is cured!

~~~

OK, so I made those up…the book is real, though, I swear.

 

 

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